What if Strawberry Panic were softcore pornography. Oh wait. it is.
July 13, 2006
Although specifically, I wrote this before I saw the episodes I commented on last post, its still kinda relevant. I thought that since Strawberry Panic is pretty much softcore hentai, what if they were making such a drama here, on this side of the Pacific? The result might have gone something like this…
TITLE – ICHIGOSHA GIRLS GONE WILD
Suzumi TAMAO – A yuri nymphomaniac with a huge crush on NAGISA. Plays the flute.
Aoi NAGISA – A young freshman inexperienced in the ways of love.
Hanazono SHIZUMA – The hardy old dormitory handyman who’s secretly a beautiful woman in disguise
Konohana HIKARI – An innocent young lady who steadfastly refuses to admit that she is gay
Nanto YAYA – HIKARI’S childhood friend who has a huge crush on her. Though they have done the horizontal ditty, HIKARI refuses to admit that they are together.
Ichigo-sha dormitory, DAY. All the usual furniture present in a student dormitory is absent, save for a large HEART SHAPED BED that dominates the room. In the corner there is a FLIMSY DESK with some of TAMAO’S PORN on it.
Enter TAMAO and NAGISA.
NAGISA: Ah! Tanoshikatta! That music lesson was so fun, wasn’t it Tamao-chan?
TAMAO: It certainly was, Nagisa-chan! but it would have been much less fun had Nagisa-chan not been there to see me play!
NAGISA: And I didn’t know that you could play the flute so well!
TAMAO laughs sweetly
TAMAO: By the way, Nagisa-chan, how are you feeling after running that marathon yesterday?
NAGISA: Actually, I’m feeling quite stiff! My muscles feel all tense and knotty.
NAGISA rubs her lower back and groans
TAMAO: Of course I would be happy to give you a massage, Nagisa-chan! Just take off all your clothes and lie back on the bed and relax.
NAGISA: All my clothes?
TAMAO: Of course, silly! How am I supposed to give you a proper massage through those thick clothes of yours?
NAGISA:(sweatdrops) Uhh, OK, Tamao-chan…
NAGISA disrobes and lies down on the HEART SHAPED BED. TAMAO removes a bottle of LUBRICANT from the desk drawer.
NAGISA: Uh…what’s that, Tamao-chan?
TAMAO quickly hides the bottle from view
TAMAO: It’s massage oil, Nagisa-chan! Massage oil!
NAGISA: But I thought I read “Mango flav…”
TAMAO: (interrupts) Don’t worry about that Nagisa-chan, you’re making your muscles more tense! Just lie back and relax, ne?
TAMAO starts to spread LUBRICANT over NAGISA’S back and thighs.
NAGISA: Ooh, that oil feels good, Tamao-chan! I can feel my aches melting away already!
TAMAO’S hands slip down to NAGISA’S NAUGHTY BITS
NAGISA: Ahh! Ohh! Tamao-chan! What are you doing? It’s dirty down there! Ahh! But it feels so good!
TAMAO: (giggles) I’ll make you feel much better, Nagisa-chan!
TAMAO glomps NAGISA. HIJINKS ensue
SFX: Knock on Door
TAMAO looks up. She has what appears to be a MILK MOUSTACHE. NAGISA is comatose.
TAMAO: Come in!
Door opens. Enter SHIZUMA dressed in DUNGAREES and carrying a TOOLKIT. She has a large FAKE MOUSTACHE.
SHIZUMA: (noticing comatose NAGISA) Oh, I’m sorry, did I come at a bad time?
TAMAO: No! Not at all! What can I help you with?
SHIZUMA: I just came to fix your fridge, but it appears that someone has removed all the tools from my toolkit and replaced them with a variety of sex toys.
TAMAO: That’s no problem at all! In fact, we don’t even have a fridge!
TAMAO glomps SHIZUMA. More HIJINKS ensue. Sometime during the proceedings, SHIZUMA’S FALSE MOUSTACHE falls off.
Enter HIKARI. TAMAO and SHIZUMA are still doing the HORIZONTAL CHA-CHA on the bed next to a comatose NAGISA. HIKARI is wearing a SUKUMIZU.
HIKARI: Hi guys! We’re here for the usual tea party. ZOMG! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!
TAMAO and SHIZUMA don’t look up. HIKARI looks horrified and takes a step back. Enter YAYA wearing a skimpy POSTAGE STAMP SIZED BIKINI.
HIKARI: But ahh! Watching them makes me feel warm and tingly inside! Am I perverted Yaya-chan?
YAYA: (seizing her chance) No, Hikari-chan! It’s perfectly normal for a girl’s tnogue to be up another girl’s ass like that! And incidentally, I have always loved you!
HIKARI: Oh Yaya-chan! I love you too!
More Glompage. Yet more HIJINKS ensue.
CUT TO: Ichigo-sha dormitory, EVENING. SHIZUMA, TAMAO, HIKARI and NAGISA (who is now awake and wondering where all the other naked girls came from) are lying in the HEART SHAPED BED. TAMAO is smoking a POST-COITAL CIGARETTE. SHIZUMA is still comatose. YAYA is flicking through TAMAO’S PORN.
NAGISA: (to HIKARI). You know, I never thought it could feel so good…you know, with another girl!
FADE TO BLACK
SCENE 1 END
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